Letter 65

June 17, 2021

On Lorde

The first time I listened to Melodrama, I was in the living room of my college apartment sitting on the couch with a friend who was sharing my bedroom for the summer—we squeezed so many people into that three-bedroom apartment, partners and exes and friends and crushes coming and going during the two years we lived there—and I remember having an immediate attachment to it the way I never really had with Pure Heroine. Listening to The Louvre and Writer In The Dark and Supercut and Perfect Places for the first time, sitting in a room bathed in pink light, surrounded by friends in the first place that really felt like home to me since I left home—I’ll probably never forget that. I’ll also probably never forget listening to those songs alone in the car at night, windows down, driving around my hometown just to do it, just because I needed to.

Jillian

I was not going through a breakup when Melodrama came out. I remember listening to it clearly; I was in my bedroom, the lights were off, and I still used Snapchat. Everything in that album felt visceral—I was, quite literally, a writer in the dark; even if my experiences were not aligned with Lorde at that moment, I felt like our emotional vibes were on the same track. As I revisit Pure Heroine, it feels more like a forever album than I had originally expected—there is always some part of me that will be longing for that sense of surrealness in coming-of-age, coupled with a hazy awareness that things will change, and no moment can ever be perfectly replicated; all we have are our memories, and that album. As I move into “adulthood” during a global pandemic, I’ve been listening to a lot of Lorde—partly in anticipation, partly because I want to imagine that surreal aliveness again, instead of the dulled movements 15 months in my house have produced. I’m not sure if I’m ready for what I’m predicting her next era will be, based off of “Solar Power”. I think, though, I want to be someone that not only longs for the sun, but goes to it.

Summer

We recommend

📺 We Are Lady Parts

This show, available on Peacock, is about a Muslim girl punk band and guess what!!!! It is as cool and fun as that description sounds!!! I watched all six episodes in a depression-haze and it helped me into a peaceful sleep. It made me cry! It made me scream (quietly, because it was 2AM)! As well as providing great camp and bright colors, the short arc of the season gives a generally balanced amount of time to each character while having a clear protagonist who carries us through. I love women!!! I need a second season, desperately, so you all have to watch it even if that means making a Peacock account!!!!

Summer

🎶 LILAC

This is the album that will get me through this summer!!! I sent it to Summer a few weeks ago and said “i think u would like this album” and she told me she was vibing to it so hard while writing to-do lists, which is such high praise, and exactly the same energy that it gives me. Vibing while I write to-do lists, vibing while I carry a 20lb bag of cat litter home, vibing while I walk to the train to go to work.

Jillian

🍽️ Watermelon with feta cheese

It’s hot outside!!!! It’s watermelon season!!!! Go get a watermelon and cut it up and put it in the fridge until it’s very very cold and top it with your favorite salty cheese, it doesn’t have to be feta. This is my favorite meal when I am combatting my constant dehydration.

Summer

🎮 2021 Wholesome Games Direct

As much fun as watching the Nintendo Direct and the rest of E3 is every year, the Wholesome Games direct is really what I look forward to the most—it’s a roundup of a bunch of cute indie games (and when I say “a bunch,” I mean it. I think this year they had about 75 games.) that are available across many platforms. Some of the games I’m most looking forward to from this year’s direct are Venba, Snacko, Soup Pot, Garden Story, Yokai Inn, and Pekoe.

Jillian